Hopefully he won't hold it against me

This morning I shared a show from my childhood with my son. I hadn't seen an actual episode since I was a kid, and it had aged even worse than I'd anticipated.

He seemed to like it okay, but he wasn't asking to watch more episodes, if you know what I mean. See what you think:


Online Videos by Veoh.com

Ace of Base rawks your face!

It's Friday, and the air is just right for having a good time. What better way to kick off your Friday night festivities than by enjoying a rendition of a popular song from the 1990s?

Arrrr.

I decided to be a day early in celebrating "Talk Like a Pirate Day" and said "Arrrrrrrrrr" for a really long time. I'm feeling better now, but while I recuperate, check out this creepy-ass toy.

The hole truth

The folks over at Nature.com have an interesting story about the history of the anus.

Yeah. You read that correctly.

I thought this was the most interesting part:

"So he and others have suggested that over time, the mouth elongated and then separated into a mouth and anus. Once the body included a gut with two ends, the anus could migrate to the far end of animal."

So now, I think, we have an explanation for the phrases "talking out of your ass" and "You know about real life like my ass chews bubblegum."

And while this article explains the origin of the anus, it still doesn't explain how so many of them end up in front of me on the freeway.

(via Monkeyfilter)

Isn't technology grand? If yes, go to Page 37.

My buddy Ken passed this along to me today, and I just thought it was slicker than snot on a doorknob.

All you fellow old people who have fond memories of Choose-Your-Own-Adventure books will at the very least grin when you see this.

Yoicks and away!

I have some stuff to do, so in lieu of actual content, here is one of my (and my son's) favorite cartoons: Robin Hood Daffy.

Evil...like it's the fru-its of the dev-il

Somehow despite being a nerd of the highest order (we were first online with Q-Link, for crap's sake), I had not yet made my way into the wonderful world of MMORPGs.

How did this happen?

Well, I'm just about as socially inept in cyberspace as I am in meatspace. I'm getting better, though; building up eptness, I guess you could say.

Anyhow, I broke down and decided to try City of Villains, partly because if I was going to try an MMORPG, it would involve superheroes and supervillains, and partly because I found it at Big Lots for only $6.99 (with the first month free).

What can I say? I'm socially inept and cheap.

I've just barely started, but I'm kinda digging it so far. I tried not to spend too long creating my first villain, because I didn't want it to be like playing The Sims, where I'd spend so much time designing the house and furnishing it that when it came time to actually play, I was over it.

My villain has mostly electrical-based powers. I thought I had the perfect name: Sparkman. Alas, it was taken. As was damn near every vaguely electricity-related name I could think of in the span of a few minutes.

I eventually ended up calling him Con Edison.

Hey, at least it wasn't already taken.

You Goonie!

I went with friends to a showing of The Goonies out in Modesto. It was the first time I'd ever seen it on the big screen, so it was kinda cool. Plus, hey, it's The Goonies, so it was cool anyway.

Something I hadn't really thought of before that I noticed this time was how many times you see up Andy's skirt throughout the movie. I mean, I know I noticed when I was an adolescent, but still.

Not a complaint, mind you; just an observation.

As a bonus, here's a YouTube vid of the excised octopus scene:

Friday night video time

One thing I liked about vacations when I was a kid: different city = different TV offerings.

When visiting relatives once in Southern California, I scoured the TV Guide to see what different shows they had. We were leaving in an hour, and it was the first chance I had to check out the prime cartoon time.

I saw the listing for the Fantastic Four cartoon (the first one, not the one with the robot). At the time, I hadn't seen the show in ages. My favorite episode wasthe one that told the team's origin.

I turned the TV to the right channel and waited for the show to come back from the commercial. And then this came on. I felt like Babe Ruth calling a home run.

FIlling a programming hole

Japanese game shows are made of pure awesome. So I was curious to see how well this translated over here. You decide.





Me, I'd be curious to see if "Silent Library" would be as cool as the original.

Crossword puzzling

I picked up The Biggest Book of TV Guide Crossword Puzzles Ever recently, and while doing a puzzle yesterday, I had the distinct impression that I'd done it before.

Sure enough, I had. For this blog, no less.

But I noticed something weird. The clue for 31 down in the old TV Guide I had was "Adjective for Cher." The answer was "exotic."

In the reprinted version, the clue is "Possible adjective for Indian food."

I doubt many people aside from me would catch such a thing, but why did they make the change?

The wartful dodger

Wow, you just don't see advertisement for wart removers like this anymore (from 'Teen, Sept. 1972):



This ad is just begging for remixing with new dialogue...

Happy birthday, Star Trek

The first episode of Star Trek debuted on this date back in 1966, a full 8 years before my birth.

I know, I'm as amazed as you that the world existed before me.

So to honor the anniversary of one of my favorite shows, and because I played game on my Nintendo DS way too long since the kids went to sleep early, I'm rounding up some Star Trek-themed posts that have appeared here.

Remember, if you haven't read them, they're new to you:

I refuse to believe in the no-win scenario and end up buying a collectible book for a pittance.

Not only am I overlooked to participate in the Star Trek Experience at Universal Studios, but it gets worse.

Remembering James "Scotty" Doohan.

Go, Fish!

You know, not only was Barney Miller a funny show, but damn if the theme song didn't have one of the coolest bass lines on TV.



And Abe Vigoda is still not dead. Go, Abe!

A cross (stitch) to bear

As part of my biggest nerd credentials, I showed off a Super Mario Brothers cross-stitch picture I made for my friend Karyne.

But if you want nerdy, we'll have to go back a little farther to when I was about 8. Having been dragged to stitchery store after stitchery store, I noticed that there were no cross-stitch patterns with a superhero theme.

Clearly this was unacceptable to me, so I decided to do something about it. I begged some graph paper from my mom, sharpened my pencil and set to work.

I wasn't going to draw any actual figures; that wouldn't translate to the blocky cross stitch style very well. But the superhero logos would do just nicely.

I knew Superman would be the focus of the picture, since as we all know, I have been and always shall be a Superman freak. I just drew smaller logos from other heroes around it.

With a little help from my mom on the outline backstitching, it wasn't too long before I had finished it:


Keeping in mind that I was 8 when I designed this, it's not too bad, I suppose. Clockwise from the top, it's Green Lantern, Aquaman (my redesign, as I considered the other one boring), Wonder Woman, Batman, Flash, Robin, and of course, Superman in the middle.

It's a little uneven in a few places (Batman, particularly), and my redesign of the Aquaman logo--if you mirrored it, it looked vaguely like a squid--still doesn't do anything for me. And the "P" in the text doesn't quite match the rest of the letters.

It's a little dirty now; apparently being kept in a box in the garage all these years wasn't quite the archival system I should have used.

But I still like it, just for the sheer nerd love it represents. Like it wouldn't have been nerdy enough to draw that; no, I had to sketch it on graph paper and then stitch it up.

And the chicks loved it.

Oh, wait. Never mind.

Joker...joker...underwater basket-weaving

It's another hair-raising Friday night here, so that means I've combed through YouTube to find something that really shines.

And how much cooler can you get than the first episode of The Joker's Wild?









My thanks, as always, to the awesome people who take the time to share this content. My hat's off to you.

Taco...grande!

I had a big post all ready to go, but then I went to pick up a few things at the store and discovered that Frito-Lay has brought back taco-flavored Doritos.

So I'm rockin' out to a late-night snack. I promise, actual content tomorrow.

In fact, I never understand these things I feel

Dammit.

I've wanted to go to visit North Carolina for a number of years now, but in this particular case, I'd give my left nut to be in Chapel Hill on September 18.

Why?

Because for the first time in 10 years--for a one-time-only show--Ben Folds Five is performing. Specifically, they're playing The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold Messner in it entirety.

It's the inaugural concert in a new series from MySpace, believe it or not, called Front to Back, in which artists play an important album of theirs from beginning to end.

I miss Ben Folds Five. A lot. Even now, when I see people talk about their BFF, I have to stop for a second and remind myself that it stands for Best Friend Forever.

Alas, short of me winning the lottery, it seems unlikely that I'm going to be able to fly across the country to catch the show.

So I will crank up my CDs and sulk at home, I guess. Bah.

Ben Folds Five

Look, up in the sky...

Sometimes it seems like there's a book that was written just for me. And while we haven't met, it seems that Brad Meltzer had me in mind with his new novel, which is in stores now, The Book of Lies. What makes me say so? Here's the blurb:

In 1932, Mitchell Siegel was killed by three gunshots to his chest. While mourning, his son dreamed of a bulletproof man and created the world's greatest hero: Superman. And like Cain's murder weapon, the gun used in this unsolved murder has never been found. Until now.

Here's the trailer:



And if you haven't read any of Brad Meltzer's books or comics, here's a brief video that might help you decide:



I'm going to check it out, just based on his previous novels, which I enjoyed. Well, that and the fact that it involves Superman in some capacity. I'm a sucker that way because Superman is important to me.

Yeah, I know people think Superman is corny; that he's a big blue Boy Scout, but to me, especially growing up, he was my hero. I went into more detail in this post. He became even more important to me when my son Harry died at 7 weeks old. On top of everything else Harry had to deal with, he also had what, the doctors informed us, is sometimes called "Superman Syndrome."

So now it might make a little more sense why tonight I'm deviating from the normal retro-themed pop-culture-obsessed blather. There's this project that just kinda hit me in the right way, not just because of its first goal, but because of its mission. It's, well, let me give Mr. Meltzer the floor briefly.



In addition to the launch of OrdinaryPeopleChangeTheWorld.com, today is the official launch of The Siegel & Shuster Society, with a celebrity charity auction that'll raise money to preserve the home of Jerry Siegel, creator of Superman, along with artist Joe Shuster.

The items up for bids are about eight different kinds of awesome, but if it's not your deal, you can buy a Siegel & Shuster Society T-shirt (designed by the legendary graphic designer Chip Kidd), or you can just make a flat donation to the cause. All proceeds of the auction go to the restoration of the Siegel house.

It would be amazing if someday, I could take my kids and show them the spot where Superman was created. And even barring that, just to show them evidence that indeed, ordinary people can and do change the world.

I'm cynical and pessimistic as a rule, but there's a part of me that embraces the optimism and good will inherent in humanity. That's the part of me that will always like Superman, who does all the great things he does, not because he should, but because he can; he just wants to help.

If you want to help, then by all means, go to www.OrdinaryPeopleChangeTheWorld.com, and you can get even more detailed information.

Ridin' the rolly coaster!

What was the first roller coaster you rode? Do you remember?

I was 10 (a late bloomer in my opinion, but I was a short kid), and my parents took my brother and me on a trip to Great America, which at the time, had recently changed from Marriott's Great America to just plain old Great America.

Now I wish I'd have been able to compare that 1985 version to the classic version of my early youth, but since, as I said, I couldn't ride much of anything, everything was fairly new to me, except for The Demon, which I decided I would ride as soon as I was able.

But The Demon wasn't my first coaster. My first coaster was The Whizzer, formerly Willard's Whizzer. It was a fairly pedestrian family coaster with a spiral lift and some nice twists and turns.

I'd have to say that it was the perfect coaster for me to start with; not too scary, not too boring. From there, I went on The Demon and anything else I could legally get on.

Here's a video of The Whizzer at Great America's former sister park in Gurnee, Illinois:



I've been thinking about theme parks, and old-school Great America in particular because I've been writing a story in which a theme park plays a role. But in my not-even-humble opinion, Great America hasn't been a true theme park for years now. Now it's just an amusement park.

Oh sure, there are some great rides, but there was something cool about how you knew where you were based on the names of the rides or the style of decor. I mean, some of the names were cheesy as hell, but at least there was a theme, you know?

Now, it's California's Great America, which to me, sounds a bit odd, but they've got some new stuff planned, and it would be awesome if there was some effort made at some actual theming for the rides since they have to change the names anyway now that they aren't a Paramount park.

What particularly frosts my Popsicle is that my two favorite rides were Loggers Run and Yankee Clipper, only one of which still stands. Back in the day, the rides were like conjoined twins; at a few points, the tracks were close enough to see the other riders. In one spot, you were close enough to fling water at them if you happened to bring a cup with you.

But Yankee Clipper departed this plane a year before Joe DiMaggio so they could put in Stealth, the "flying" roller coaster. Don't get me wrong, Stealth was a cool ride--though my already long wait in line was made longer to rig a camera for some chucklehead from 98 Degrees to get pics taken for Tiger Beat or somesuch and they made me take my glasses off, so I saw a whole crapton of blurry nothing--but after only a few years, they took it out and moved it to another park. My Yankee Clipper had died in vain!

I know, I should just chill. Loggers Run is still there, I know.

But my brother and I had our own little name for the Yankee Clipper; one that I'm not at liberty to divulge, but should I finish and publish this novel I'm working on, you will discover. We had alternate names for most of the rides, as we had a lot of time on our hands with season passes in the summer of 1994. And we were dorks.

Good thing I grew out of that.