Journey into Jeff's Brain III: The Search for Relevance

Colgate Pump



I know I complained about using cool songs for commercials, but I still love this one. To this day, I can't sing the real words to "Baggy Trousers" by Madness. Oh, it starts out that way, but before too long, I hear myself singing "We've got the Colgate pump, we love the Colgate pump..."

Plus, I thought the girl in the checked dress was cute when this first came out.

Toys R Us



While checking out a thrift store years ago, I came across an "I'm a Toys R Us kid" sweatshirt. It remains in the Siftin' archival storage until my son gets old enough to wear it.

Encyclopedia Brittanica



I'd remember this much more fondly if my friends hadn't insisted that the guy in this looked just like me. And boy, what fun it was when on a field trip, we saw an Encyclopedia Brittanica store.

Mego Superheroes



I loved the half-assed descriptions of the various heroes in this lineup of cool toys. The best: "The Falcon...that great black superhero." Like that was the only thing they could think of to say.

It's also pretty clear they had no idea what the Fantastic Four did. "The [Human] Torch...faster than the speed of light!" They did okay with the Thing, but "Mr. Fantastic and the Invisible Girl -- both have the powers of invisibility." Wha-huh?

Tootsie Pop



I once wrote an article for the school newspaper on how many licks it took to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. I think it was something like 971. Fortunately, I had no social life to get in the way of my scientific pursuit.

McDonald's commercial


I still hear the words to this commercial when I hear "Für Elise."

This is Your Brain on Drugs



Despite what anyone else will tell you, I was the first person to make the "Can I get some toast with that?" joke about this commercial. Proven scientific fact.*

* Well, no, not really.