A knight out on the town

We took my son, Brody, trick-or-treating the other night. We took him last year, but he was only a year old, so he wasn't much of a participant. He just tried to walk into people's houses and even gave hugs to a few people.

But now, he's a year older, and a little more prepared for trick-or-treating. I'd been working with him on exactly how the process worked.

"Okay, you ring the doorbell, and when the person answers the door, you say 'trick or treat.'" Can you say 'trick or treat'?"

"Yes."

"Well, let's hear it."

Nothing.

"And after they give you the candy, what do you say?"

"Thank you."

"Good job. That's using your manners." I'm trying to teach him to use good manners, which is akin to Mike Tyson teaching ballroom dancing.

So when the time came, we got him into his knight costume and gave him my wife's old jack o'lantern bucket to carry his Halloween booty in.

"Go outside?"

"Yep, we're going outside to go trick-or-treating. Can you say 'trick or treat'?"

"Yes."

"Well, let's go. Remember to say thank you when you get some candy."

"Thank you."

So we got to the first house and rang the doorbell. (Brody's still a little too short to handle that on his own.) The door opened, and Brody stood there quietly.

"Brody, what do you say?" my wife asked, hoping to prod him into saying "trick or treat."

Without hesitation, he answered "Please!"

Close enough.

Candy dropped into his bucket.

"Brody, what do you say?" I figured at least he'd nail this part, and he'd look very well-mannered.

"Bye!"

He says thank you every time I hand him one of his cars or give him some Goldfish crackers, but when he gets candy from strangers, all he says is "Bye."

He didn't get fussy during our brief trek; in fact, it was only near th end that he asked us to hold his bucket for him ("Heavy," he explained).

He still seemed a little eager to just walk right in to people's houses, especially the one answered by a young woman with glasses. He just stood there smiling after he got his candy.

He has a thing for brunettes with glasses.

And Rachael Ray, even though she doesn't wear glasses.

We ended up going to about a dozen or so houses and came home with a pretty good haul. Brody, being the generous soul he is, let old Mom and Dad have at the candy after he was done counting it.

The fact that he doesn't like candy didn't have anything to do with it, I'm sure.