Friday, September 30, 2005

Dumb idea du jour of the day

Like I've said before, I get lots of things floating through my head. Some, like Jell-O breast implants (safe, moldable, and hey, there's always room for Jell-O), are not such great ideas.

Some are dumb ideas with a spark of novelty. You be the judge.

My idea: a waffle iron with changeable iron plates. Each plate has a maze on it that kids can try to solve by pouring syrup on the path of their choice. To avoid getting too tired of the same maze, there are different mazes on the plates that fit into the iron.

Obvious problems: If you suck at mazes, your waffle is ice cold by the time you're done.

But as a novelty item, who knows?

The name would be something like The A-maze-ing Waffle Maker. One of my super powers is the ability to come up with a catchy if inane name for products.

I saw a commercial for a product called UrineGone. It's supposed to help clean up pet pee incidents, although they make a point to mention that it works for people, too. The announcer says the name of the product at least 30 times in just a minute or two, and each time, the name sounds lamer and lamer.

Instead of UrineGone, isn't PissAway a better name? Not only does it describe the product, but it's also indicative of what you're doing with your money when you buy it.


  1. I like the waffle idea!

  2. Joel McHale on The Soup actually had the Urine Gone as his disgusting clip of the week a while back, and decided it should be called Piss Off instead. So you're on the right track if you want to be like Joel McHale. :D

  3. I haven't seen the show. Is being like him a good thing?

  4. Anonymous7:19 PM

    Hah! I Google'd ["urine gone" pissaway OR "piss away"]. I got three hits. This one was the only site that had anything good. The other was really a GWB/cabletv rip about Iraq/Iran: "Look over here, don't watch real news."

    I think it should be called 'Piss Away', too... but ooooooh, PISS is a bad word. Bad, so bad it makes me want to... hold on, too much beer...

    Okay, back again. Had to fertilize a tree, but if a cop had seen me doing it, I would've been arrested and given a $300 fine. Anyway, this always reminds me of the term, "Pissed Off" -- what the hell is the etymology of that term?!?! I mean, think about it. Brainstorm. How did 'pissed off' come to mean 'really angry' ??

    Something for English Majors to look into. Fortunately, since ingles is my native language, and I grew up in America, I pretty much knew everything important having grown up with Schoolhouse Rock. Noun, verb, adjective, adverb, stop analyzing the rest. It isn't freakin' Latin.

    Now, go piss yourself.