Lincoln, Lincoln, I've been thinkin', what the heck have I been drinkin?

I scored some new Jones Sodas at Target last week. They are Halloween-themed Target exclusives.

And coolest of all, they're in the little half-size cans.

I have a love-hate relationship with miniature versions of familiar products. On one hand, it's nice to have a smaller portion.

On the other hand, it messes with my sense of perception. I got Ritz Bits in my lunch when they were still a new phenomenon and thought that I had grown to Brobdingnagian proportions. Looking around, I noticed that I was still shorter than my peers and assumed that my new power was only evident when compared to snack crackers.

Plus, I had a lot of cough syrup that morning. But I digress.

The sodas come in four flavors: Candy Corn, Caramel Apple, Strawberry S'Lime and Scary Berry Lemonade.

Being the brave person I am -- plus I wanted to be a giant again -- I bought a four-pack of each and sampled them.

First tip: Make sure they are chilled. Warm soda is no fun, and in the case of Dr Pepper could be dangerous.

I drank a Dr Pepper that had been sitting in the car in the heat and I swear I almost burned my tongue off. Play it safe -- use ice.

Anyway, I tried Candy Corn first. One of the local grocery stores has offered a red licorice soda through their house brand line of sodas. It was actually pretty good, and it tasted remarkably like red licorice. Would Candy Corn live up to my expectations?

Well, yes and no. Thankfully, it wasn't as sweet as it could have been, but it didn't really hit me with the "Oh, this totally tastes like candy corn" realization I was hoping for.

It does taste a bit like candy corn. It has a kind of caramelly overtaste with hints of citrus in the background.

Look at me, I sound like a wine snob.

Caramel Apple was also not as sweet as I had feared and was pretty good. The caramel element was quite light, giving it a taste very close to Jones' Green Apple soda. Still, pretty tasty.

Strawberry S'Lime was OK. I usually get strawberry limeades when I go to Sonic, so I was a little disappointed that this didn't have the same bite I associate with this flavor pairing.

Scary Berry Lemonade was my least favorite. It wasn't particularly scary, I must say, and if not for the Halloween-themed can, wouldn't really stand out very much.

Jones Soda has in the past come up with a turkey-and-gravy flavored soda, so by comparison, these Halloween offerings are quite tame. I'm a little surprised they didn't try pumpkin.

At least now I can say that I drank four cans of soda in only a few minutes.